Help my wife… and me!

The Memphis Flyer has an annual Best Of Memphis Reader’s Poll. It is a great way for the folks who read the Flyer to give their favorite stores some props. The poll gets a lot of action and the results are read by a ton of people here in the Mid-South. I am asking you to help Autumn get her store, Mango Street Baby, in the poll!

Here is how you do it. Oh, and thanks in advance – it really means a lot to me and to her! Go to the Flyer’s Best Of Reader’s Poll page HERE. Go to VOTE NOW! If you want to vote on all the categories, fine – but the important part is on the last page, maybe 7 clicks into the poll. There is a “Best Category We Left Out” write-in block. Write in Best Baby Store or Best Place to Buy Baby Clothes/Bedding/Gear or something like that and be sure and put MANGO STREET BABY in there!

Let me know if you have any problems with it and thanks for the vote. Oh, feel free to share this with a TON of people!

Really, it’s okay. It’s no big deal…

One thing that really irritates me is when you ask someone to do something to help you out, they agree then somehow back out – EVERY FU*%ING TIME. Whether the reason they gave is a real problem or a natural cause or work – whatever, when it is EVERY FU*%ING TIME you start losing sympathy for when something bad happens. Maybe that’s not very understanding of me, yeah. But at some point, I gotta stop letting people walk on me – or not ask for their help. But it gets worse when they say things like, “You never ask us to come over and help!”, or “You don’t trust us enough to help you!” You are correct because I know someting HUGE is going to happen (because it always does) and I am going to have to change my plans, again, to accomodate whatever it is that happened and it turns around as if I am the one who inconvenienced you. Off the soap box for now…

Decisions, decisions

Petrea, our almost three year old, was given the opportunity to make the decision on whether she wanted a Princess party for her birthday or a Rock-N-Roll party for her birthday. She chose the Princess route (rats) - but, thankfully, has brought up the Rock-N-Roll idea many times since making that decision. Some have quipped that she is too young to realize what it means to have made a decision like that – but I am not convinced of that. Here’s why…

At night, PT has a sort of schedule. We go upstairs, brush her teeth, wash her face, maybe brush her hair, read “Corduroy Goes to the Doctor” then she wants a Princess story. (It gets good because she calls them Princess Petrea or Princess Daddy stories. Make all the jokes you want, I love it!) But, she pretty much narrates the story and makes decision about where the story goes; if the story is scary or happy, and, of course, when it ends. Even better than just making those choices, she sticks with them for the whole story and seems to realize that the choices made about, say, being in the forest or being in a field, have a large bearing on where we are at the end of the story. If Princess Petrea, Princess Soah, Princess Mommy, and Princess Daddy all walk through the forest and over the hill and swim through the river, she knows that you have to go back through those things to get back to Princess Petrea’s castle in order to get in bed. She also gets that if you swim through the water with a bag of candy, well, it’s gonna melt – so maybe we can find some stepping stones or a bridge…

Hopefully this is also teaching her about the consequences of decisions and what happens if you decide to dye your hair pink the day before school pictures. I am hanging on to this one to see how I do…

Tour de France

I don’t know how people watch the Tour de France. Even if you ride, it is sorta boring. Unless, you begin to understand the strategy.

For instance, I used to think NASCAR was worse than golf on television. I could at least see that golfers had to perform and their practice paid off. NASCAR was a bunch of left turns going real fast and not running out of gas. Then, I started listening to the folks explaining that there was a strategy and I began to understand and see those things. All of the sudden, NASCAR was a little more interesting – even without the wrecks.

Cycling and the Tour is full of strategy and glory and heartbreak and trashtalk. Although the trashtalking is considerably more dignified than what most fans of sport are used to here in the US, it is still smack. Each day of a stage race is full of strategy – team members working tirelessly to pull their leader up a climb, domestiques falling back to get water and food, race leaders faking weakness to get other teams to do the work at the front of the race, only to stomp them in the ground once they are tired and win on Alpe d’Huez… You gotta love a two man breakaway that attacks 5k into a 180k stage – and stays away! Someone compared those breakaways to junior high boys trying to get lovin’ on Saturday night. They try and try and try and fail and fail and fail. But that one time when it works, it’s just magical!

The Tour only lasts three weeks out of every year and it is rife with its problems and I doubt there will be many good ole day memories between me and the girls of us sitting around watching the Tour in our jammies. But, I enjoy it as much as I enjoy an other sport on tv. Those are some of the greatest athletes on the planet and should be respected for that. Three weeks of racing more than 3,500 kms (@2,200 miles) can’t be denied. Funny how much respect a little 130 lb Frenchman or Spaniard in tights commands that much respect!

The countdown begins…

It would have normally started a month ago, but with the new job and everything happening at the house, the beach countdown started today at lunch! Leaving tomorrow after lunch and driving to Fairhope to see some family. Checking in at the beach on Sunday. I would like to convice myself that driving to Pensacola on Saturday to watch the Blue Angels do their beach show is a can’t miss opportunity. I just don’t know if my wife will see it that way (Hi, Honey!). Anyway, less than 24 hours and I will be on the road to the edge of our country. w00t!

Where are those keys….

Some of you know that Autumn’s car got broken into when we were at Rock-n-Romp a week or so ago. There was a little body damage where whoever it was popped the glass out with a screwdriver so that meant a little more time at the body shop. For this reason, I had to rent a car for a couple days last week. In all the Thursday excitement of returning the car by 6:00, picking up Autumn’s car by 6:30 and getting out of town for a little R&R, it’s a wonder that I only left my keys in the rental car. However, I didn’t know I left them there until this morning…

I spent hours Sunday evening searching for my keys. I had my stomach worked in knots trying to find them. But this is what I do – take something like lost keys and turn it into something huge that consumes me and, in turn, bugs the crap out of the people around me (Autumn).

I went by Enterprise on the way to work this morning and they had my keys. Crisis averted – but I was still upset, even after I got the keys and continued to work. Then, on the way to work, I realized how much I do this. I get worked up over the smallest things. One thing lately that I really find myself dwelling on is the time I don’t spend with my kids – or, maybe getting the most out of the time I am not at work and can spend time with Autumn and the girls. We are going to Florida next week and I will have 24/7 with them – that will be good. But somewhere inside, I still worry that as time ticks by faster and faster, I have lost so many moments to let my kids and my wife know how much they mean to me. I have had more than one person tell me I spend plenty of time with my family – more than what many get to spend, actually. That makes me feel good, but I can’t help but dwell on how many moments I think I am missing to teach my kids something or just to let them know what they mean to me.

How am I ever going to let them go to grandparents for the week/summer camp/college?

Please, Please Stop Yelling

Yelling at me about your low car prices WILL NOT entice me to come buy a car from you. Honestly, it makes me want to travel to another city to buy the car I want so I don’t have to have your dealership logo on my car. I am sure that the dealerships in the other cities have the same idiotic commercials, but at least I don’t have to hear them so it makes buying a car from them better, in my eyes. Stupid commercials that pretend to be contestants on game shows, or Austin Powers or your stereotyped version of Asian-Americans just piss me off. I don’t get traffic in the morning much anymore because I have almost boycotted the radio stations that play those stupid commercials. I can’t stand it and would rather pay for satellite radio so I do not have to hear dealership commercials anymore. Why don’t they realize they don’t have to advertise like that? People are going to buy cars. The market isn’t going away. If those places have that kind of money to pay for that much ad time, then use it to piss away on stupid commercials, they certainly don’t need my purchase. And I don’t think I am alone on this. Tell me you have a great deal on a great vehicle that gets good gas mileage and throw in 5 oil changes/tire rotations. Customers want service and most savvy customers know that if you are spending that much money on your ads, they are paying for it when they buy your merchandise. Start giving better service and you won’t have to prop up with your cowboy hat and suit to yell at me about how you can get me financed. If you’re going to wear the hat, AT LEAST get a Western suit. The hat just looks stupid with a business suit…

Really, your hair looks great…

I came across a post on a friend’s blog not long ago that troubled me. A haircut turned in to a very tough situation for her. Here is the post. Then, after some reflection on the situation, Carolyn filed this post where she has concluded that her anger at her husband’s reaction to her haircut was maybe a little unfair.

This got me to thinking about the recent discussions I have had with my wife about her getting her hair cut and why I am not sure I like the idea.

Yes, I am writing a post about women’s hair – and it gets deep… Deeper than it should, but here goes!

BTW, here is where I start playing the generalization game (only because of experience), but most men did not start a relationship with a woman solely because of her hair. It can play a part, but really, I have NEVER heard a man say, “Dude, check out her hair!”, then move on to comments about other parts of her body. NEVER. So, how could a haircut cause so much strife between a couple?

Here is where I think it gets deeper than it probably should, but most men in a relationship don’t REALLY notice a woman’s hair unless she does something major. Yes, we notice when you get highlights or layers cut in to your hair – but most of the time, we don’t know exactly what’s different, just that there is something different. And wouldn’t it be a tense situation when a man notices the change, but doesn’t know how to say what the change is so an already conscious woman reads too much into the comment and well… All of the sudden, hair is REALLY important. But is it about noticing her hair or “her?” That is probably discussed in the Mars and Venus book, so we’ll skip that…

Let me offer my explanation of why men stay out of the “hair business” and only from my experiences. Most men view a woman’s hair as some sort of emotional barometer that indicates the level of change that woman is in need of.

Let me set this one up a little bit.

Women invest countless hours, months and years into their hair. They also (lucky for us) invest countless hours, months and (hopefully) years into their realtionship with us. (Yes, I am comparing a woman’s relationship with her hair to her relationship with her man.) Everything seems to be going along just great, the next thing you know, your wife/girlfriend’s trip to the beauty shop to get some highlights has turned into a life altering experience – the long hair that *everyone* is used to is gone and Meg Ryan’s “Sleepless In Seattle” hair has now planted itself on your wife/girlfriend’s head…

In my limited experience, personally and with so many guy friends, when the hair goes – so do you. It’s just that simple. A decision to change something that big usually means that other life decisions about change are being made. And you, sir, could be up for negotiation.